Monthly Archives: July 2019

This Is Your Warning

I can see it now:  it will be the year 2039, and people who call themselves Ex-Christians will be marching in Gay Pride Parades, sponsored by NAMBLA.  (That’s the “North American Man Boy Love Association” for those who don’t spend as much time as I do, researching depraved ideologies on the internet.)  Popular activists, many of whom still consider themselves “spiritual,” will be apologizing for the way they used to treat pedophiles, saying things like:

“…to the Man-Boy Love community, I want to say that I am sorry for the views that I once taught in my books and as a pastor regarding sexuality. I regret standing against sexual rights for children, for not affirming you and your place in the church, and for any ways that my writing and speaking contributed to a culture of exclusion and bigotry. I hope you can forgive me.”

The rapid normalization of pedophilia will be a MAJOR issue for The Church in 20 years, and I imagine that my grown children will want to fight that cultural battle…

But, I fear that they won’t be able to have conversations with their fellow Christians about the damage being done by the “Sexual Freedom” movement, because everyone will still be focusing on Josh Harris’ book “I Kissed Dating Goodbye,” published in 1997. 


In case you don’t know, Josh Harris apologized for the book he wrote about Christian Sexual Ethics when he was still a kid.

It seems, before he got married, Josh was under the impression that having a wife would solve all of his problems, especially the sexual frustration–and he passed on his Formula-for-Great-Sex to many gullible peers.

So, now he feels the need to apologize to everyone that he influenced to wear a tacky ring and miss out on hot dates.


But, Josh unintentionally got a few things right. He wrote:

“…[our generation has] wished for intimacy without obligation. We wished for sex with no strings attached. We wished for the pleasure of love with none of the work, none of the vows, none of the sacrifice.

And we got it.

But the results aren’t what we hoped for. And we’re left feeling emptier than before. The intimacy is superficial. The sex leaves us dissatisfied and hungry for something real, something true. Where is true joy? It’s found in God’s brand of love – love founded on faithfulness, rooted in commitment…”

This is a chunk of truth which Young Joshy was correct to endorse–even if he stumbled on it by accident.

So, it’s unfortunate that Grown-Up Josh has begun backtracking and apologizing for even the TRUE things in his old book, as he shifts away from Christianity altogether.

If there are any peers who may be tempted to let Josh Harris’ half-baked ideas influence them–just like they did the 90’s–let me speak to you bluntly:


Josh is still a confused, spiritually immature dude who is better at putting words together than at thinking about them first.  He seems to say some smart things now and then.  But, his Theology is pretty man-centric and crappy.  (JUST AS, APPARENTLY, IT ALWAYS HAS BEEN.)

Dozens and dozens of people have lamented that Josh led them astray when they were teens, because he told them God cares about purity, so–to those people–I am going to shout this next part:


We should be able to think about what we’re being taught, and then take the good while leaving the bad.  We shouldn’t decide to swallow everything a person says, just because they’re young and published.

Don’t come crying to me in 20 more years because Josh seemed to suggest that sexual freedom would lead to happiness, and now you realize the Anti-Purity Movement has ruined your life.

I am trying to warn you now that your are too easily led astray with your focus on formulas instead of God.

When I ask God what he thinks about I Kissed Dating Goodbye, I can conclude that the statement “purity starts in the heart” was true.  But NOW that Josh Harris is renouncing Christ and talking about “marriage equality,” he’s off track and leading people astray.

All Christians ought to strive for the ability to make these judgments for themselves.

We ought to recognize that it doesn’t make sense for Grown-Up Josh to say sorry for preaching “a less-than-biblical view of sexuality,” when he no longer reveres the bible himself.

We ought to recognize the inconsistency of an ex-preacher who tries to affirm gay people having a “place in the church” THAT HE LEFT…

If you cannot read problematic words and see those issues for yourself, then you should beg God for wisdom and the courage to use it.  (But don’t take my word for it.  Ask good questions and ask the Holy Spirit if what I’m saying here is solid.)


Unless you figure out how to discern Truth from falsehood, you will continue being led astray by popular books about dating and blog posts about “deconstructing faith” and activists who are pressuring you to accept pedophilia in the year 2039.

Don’t wait for two decades and an official apology before you learn to recognize what’s right and good and true.

Ask God to teach you how to resist false teaching RIGHT NOW.

Even Holier Than Thou

Sometimes church people will invite each other to say nice things about going to church.

They might ask, “Where do you go to church?…and what do you like about it?”

My own reason for going is pretty simple: we’re a family, and family is forever.  Even when we don’t LIKE each other, that’s just too bad. But, to spin the concept slightly more positively, I’ll say it like this:

Mainly, what I like about church is that it’s full of people for whom Christ died. 

Yes, I get annoyed with the shallow sermons.  Yes, the contrived “programs” make me cringe.  Yes, song lyrics seem to get stupider every, single year. And, if that’s not bad enough, I have to sit near people who might hold a grudge and gossip about me just because I said those things…

But, maddeningly, JESUS LOVES THOSE PEOPLE who think differently from me.  Together, we are Christ’s Bride–and He is purifying us for his glory, with every week we struggle to figure out how to get along…

I like going to church because it forces me to wrestle with my pride. It helps me remember that I’m not better than any of the annoying, weak-willed fools who attend there.

If I don’t spend time being challenged to love my brothers and sisters, I’ll become something self-centered and unlovable myself…

Quite frankly, I don’t want to start sounding like this prideful person (and the “millions” of other people who give up on their church families):

7.26.19 Jesus Loves You Even Those As Insufferable as Janice (edit)

Church people have to listen to this criticism all the time…

“You’re hateful…you’re bigoted… you’re hypocritical…”

But there’s only one reason to STOP HANGING OUT WITH CHURCH PEOPLE when they do these holier-than-thou things:

You think you’re even holier than they are.

Teach Your Boys to Think of Others

(Language Warning.  What’s in our hearts will come out of our mouths, and today’s post features a few people with hearts full of rage…)

One of the things that gets repeated by feminists fairly often is, “We must teach boys how to respect women and control their impulses.”

Yesterday, the women making this point were mad because they were asked to cover their breasts at the city pool while breastfeeding. Many people mentioned the teenaged boys who would be surprised to catch an eyeful of a stranger’s boob when it’s not supposed to be a nude beach.

Here are examples of the responses:

7.14.19 Men Will Be Attracted (edited) (2)

7.14.19 Men Will Be Attracted (edited) (3)

I totally agree with the ladies saying it’s a mother’s responsibility to teach her boys how to respect others. But, I think we’ve forgotten that parents teach those lessons by MODELING THEM.

We must PRACTICE what we want them to learn.

Who’s modeling behavior that teaches a boy he is entitled to a woman’s body?

Is it the mothers showing their infants/toddler’s how to cover themselves in public? Or is it those who don’t believe in breastfeeding rules because their kids should get whatever they want “on demand.”

Who’s teaching their sons that only their perceived needs matter?

The mothers showing consideration for the other people in a room? Or the ones saying–point blank–they don’t care what anyone else thinks or feels?

7.14.19 Revenge Nursing (for blog post) (2) (edited)

7.13.19 Revenge Nursing (2) (Edited)

Which mothers are teaching their sons to respect personal boundaries?

Is it the mothers who demonstrate “modesty” and SELF-respect?

Or is it the ones who discover that their actions are causing someone to feel uncomfortable–and so they GO EVEN FURTHER, to flex their power?*

7.13.19 Revenge Nursing (3) (Edited)

7.14.19 Who Teaches Boys to Be Selfish Again (3) (Edited)

7.14.19 Who Teaches Boys to Be Selfish Again (2) (Edited)

7.14.19 Revenge Nursing (for blog post) (1) (edited)

If a man shared increasingly revealing pictures of his body on public bulletin boards, not just despite but BECAUSE people told him they didn’t like it, we’d all be creeped out… How is that not sexual harrassment?

It’s completely unacceptable.

And it wouldn’t suddenly become okay if the dude put a baby on his lap. In fact, using that innocent child as a defense of his creepy behavior would make it even worse.

So, I agree that it’s up to parents to teach their children what is acceptable and what isn’t. It’s heartbreaking that so many beautiful and natural things are being corrupted by unmasked selfishness.   Neither the man who views women as sex objects nor the woman who uses her children for attention are making the world a better place.

We MUST teach our boys not to be self-focused and entitled.

We MUST teach our boys they can’t have everything they want, on demand.

We MUST teach them to have RESPECT for their fellow humans and SELF-CONTROL, even when they are tempted to give into their animal instincts and force their will on others.

And–in exactly the same way–we must teach these things to our daughters.  To borrow a comment from a certain Anonymous Poster up above, “If you have a daughter who fails to cover her body in public, you’ve obviously failed as a mother to teach her a) how to respect herself and b) how to respect others.” (That goes double if she swears like a sailor every time she’s caught behaving badly instead of taking responsibility and correcting it.) “I hope you never allow your daughters to go to the beach.”

The world needs mothers who are willing to teach their children how to avoid being aggressive, self-centered monsters… which we will do by avoiding becoming aggressive, self-centered monsters ourselves.


(*Note: I strongly considered publishing these pictures and comments with names attached.  After all, the women posted these things publicly, expecting strangers to see them, and they insist there is nothing to be ashamed of. But I finally decided to protect their identities for simplicity and my own peace of mind…  This post is about criticizing the toxic ATTITUDE–it’s not about pin-pointing the specific people who have it.)

If I Vote for Trump, I Will OVERCOME My Fear

Yesterday I examined an article by David French which stated that Evangelicals are supporting Trump because they are afraid of losing political power and they see Trump as a Savior.
I argued that there are at least a few people voting for Trump for reasons other than “fear.” But I didn’t talk much about why I’m considering switching my vote from third party back to Trump in the next election…
These last few years have taught me a lot. Specifically, the entire Brett Kavanaugh spectacle taught me a lot. The fact that he was a well-respected, highly-accomplished, family man with a solid history of fair rulings…. until THE MOMENT he was nominated for the Supreme Court and bogus accusers started crawling out of the woodwork… that was the start of a pretty big shift for me.
Suddenly I realized, “Oh–I see–when we nominate really strong Christians, we’re shouted down about the Separation of Churst and State and told this isn’t a Theocracy… and, then, when we nominate moderate guys, who do their jobs well and without preaching, THEN the opponents will just make up stuff.”
So, why did I let my FEAR of those people calling me a “hypocrite” determine who I voted for?
Why did I feel any need to explain myself to people who will throw mud either way?
And that’s when I started to ask myself, “Who would I elect, if I wasn’t concerned with being able to brag that I did the different and brave thing by voting third party?”
Believe me, it has been fun telling the triggered Atheists that I didn’t vote for Trump, when they find out I’m a Christian and automatically assume I did. But, the truth is, I once said I would even consider voting FOR AN ATHEIST, if he or she had a team of people and a platform that I thought would lead to more freedom and less government. So, voting for a Trumpesque politician, whose personal life doesn’t match mine, never was completely off the table.
In the end, the biggest reason I decided to vote for a third party in 2016 was to remind the Republicans that they can’t count on my support just because they’ve had it in the past.
And I still stand by that message.
Just because a clown has an “R” next to his name doesn’t mean he’s a shoe-in, because many of us (“evangelicals?”) have no problem taking our votes elsewhere.
But, as my views shift from “Libertarian-Leaning” toward a belief that the moral decline in our culture will require the government to act more and more as a leash for evil, now the types of leaders I consider good for the job are beginning to shift, too. I’m starting to recognize the usefulness of people I once would have dismissed as “clowns.”
Anyway, my point is that David French may be right that “fear” is motivating some Trump supporters, because they believe that any other President would drive the country literally to death.
But it was also fear of social repercussions which motivated many Christians NOT to vote for Trump. I was one of those Christians.
Perhaps I will take David French’s advise and have more faith in the next election…
Maybe I will conquer my fear of looking like a Trump Apologist and vote for the guy whose team has done a pretty good job.

Why “Evangelicals” Voted for Trump

Can you even remember the last time the term “evangelical” was used to describe a GOOD trend among Church People? I’ll be honest, I’m not even sure exactly what an “evangelical” is–strictly speaking–because no one has nice things to say about them.

It seems to me that no sane person would ever call himself an Evangelical, because it’s such an obvious insult. It’s an unfortunate label that gets assigned to you by critics when you do something racist or hypocritical.

Most of the time political commentators use the word “evangelical” to refer to “Christians behaving badly.” (Just as they use the term “Millennial” when they want to refer to young people behaving badly.)

“Evangelicals” are the Christians In Name Only… they’re the low class, White Trash, Bible-Thumpers…

They’re the Trump Fan Boys.

I haven’t actually asked this dude what he believes, but you can bet that someone from HuffPo would call him out as an “Evangelical”:

If THAT GUY is who David French had in mind when he wrote his article about “evangelicals,” then I guess that’s fine. (I prefer to call people like THAT GUY “Boomers.” And you can see more posts from Boomers, both real and satirical, on this social media group: “For God So Loved the World That he Gave His Only Trump.”)

But, I don’t think the majority of people who voted for Trump are as off the rails as “Boomers” like THAT GUY.

That’s why it annoys me to see headlines like David French’s: Evangelicals Are Supporting Trump out of Fear, Not Faith
Again, maybe I’m misunderstanding what he means by “evangelicals.” Maybe my friends and family who voted for Trump don’t count. Or maybe they’re not SUPPORTERS, in French’s estimation, unless they’re enthusiastic cheerleaders of every, single thing Trump does.
Maybe you’re not a Trump Supporting Evangelical unless you sound like this person:

But the real-life people I know who voted for Trump don’t seem to be “grasping at their fading influence by clinging to [Trump],” as David French describes. Nor are they “acting as if they need Trump to protect” them.

French says that these Trump Supporting Evangelicals have VETO POWER, which means there are a lot of them… But the only person he mentioned by name was Eric Metaxas, who said in 2016:

“It’s a fact that if Hillary Clinton is elected, the country’s chance to have a Supreme Court that values the Constitution – and the genuine liberty and self-government for which millions have died – is gone. Not for four years, or eight, but forever.”

A little hyperbolic, yes.

But who gave David French the authority to judge Eric Metaxas’ heart motivation as “fearful?” What makes him so sure it is “raw fear” which causes Metaxas to urge his fellow Christians against Hillary Clinton–but it’s not also raw fear to warn against Donald Trump? What’s the difference?

(Indeed, David French says that the church’s witness is at risk of “degrading further,” and that, “the church has lost its way.” I hope he has the faith to realize God is still in control, even if Trump is renominated.)


All that to say, I don’t know who these fearful, Trump-loving, morally-compromising “evangelicals” are…. but, my friends and family who voted for Trump aren’t quaking in their boots and being kept up at night with worry.

They are fairly reasonable (and mostly literate) citizens, who can speak for themselves about the process they use to cast a vote, and they are NOT wearing MAGA hats and playing defense against the “Dumbocraps.”

(Not like this guy:)

The more people confuse my intelligent, stable loved ones with the Trump Worshipping psychos, the LESS I want to consider voting for a third party (again)…

Calling people faithless “evangelicals” has almost become like calling them “racists” or “misogynists” or “white supremacists” back in 2016–which is precisely the type of vague, baseless criticism that lead to Trump’s election.

Lots of people who voted for Trump are NOT morally-compromising, power-craving, easily-influenced morons. If you don’t find out what DOES motivate them, then you’re never going to win their vote.

You might try asking someone who voted for Trump, individually, what lead to their decision, instead of speaking about them like they have a hive mind. (Especially when you never have anything positive to say about the Hive… I’m serious when I say that criticism of “evangelicals” looks an awful lot like ‘raw fear’ that they will re-elect He Who Shall Not Be Named. EEEEEK!)

Saying that “evangelicals” are voting for Trump because of “fear” is exactly like saying “Millenials” voted for Obama because they wanted free stuff.

(Except, you often get away with stereotyping Christians because they’re good at saying, “Oh, you’re probably right… I’ve been convicted… Thank you, Jesus, for not giving up on me, even though I’m a terrible, terrible sinner.”)

But I’m not okay with these generalities, when they result in unfair characterizations of people I actually know. I’m not okay with articles telling me what “evangelicals” are doing, when I love people who call themselves Evangelicals, and I can see their actions for myself, thanks.