Some of my peers have a problem.
They KNOW that a big portion of their neighbors are hateful racists…but they don’t have the evidence to prove it to the rest of the world.
Some have tried to popularize the term “microaggression” by suggesting that being called horrible names on social media is comparable to historical lynchings. But people aren’t really buying that. And, as microaggressions increase, the cases of actual aggression are in pretty short supply.
So, what’s a good Justice Champion to do?
The solution: join the rising number Fake Hate Crime Artists.
You don’t know who Taylor Volk is–but you ought to. She has been drawing attention to the hateful, threatening notes she received as a result of Trump’s election. (On her social media, she included pictures of the notes, with homophobic slurs!)
The problem is: she made the whole thing up.
This puts Taylor in good company with Kathy Mirah Tu, who report a racist attack, which turned out to be false…
And with Sarah Harvard, who posted to social media with a hearsay report of Trump-inspired violence that the police department couldn’t verify.
Then there’s Ashley Boyer, who claimed to have been assaulted by four caucasians while they talked about the election results…
Plus, don’t forget the unnamed, female student who allegedly had a hijab ripped from her head by a white guy wearing a Trump hat… which is similar to Eleesha Long’s debunked story that her attackers were wearing Trump T-shirts... and this man who claimed his attackers told him it’s “Trump country now.”
None of them really happened.
And all of these are just the confirmed fake crimes in the last two weeks since the election.
So, in addition to the first problem I mentioned, it seems my peers have an even bigger problem: they’re really bad at faking hate crimes.
Presumably, there are people sending themselves threats and setting their own houses on fire and blackening their own eyes who are actually getting away with it…
But what’s the secret to their success?
Can I help the rest of the poor, victim-minded young people do a better job convincing the world they’ve been victimized?
Here’s a helpful list of pointers to get you started.
Pulling Off a More Convincing Hate Crime
- DO file a police report. Yes, I realize it’s illegal to file false reports. But go big or go home! Do you want to make the world a better place, or not?!
- DON’T tell the police officer that your attacker handed you his business card reading, “Professional Racist Intimidator, hired by Donald J. Trump.” You will convince DeRay Mckesson and Shaun King with that evidence–but probably not the officer.
- DO include video or pictures of any notes or graffiti you’ve planted on your own property. People love to see their assumptions confirmed in full color.
- DON’T tell your friends you “have names” or a license plate number or that the police caught the attackers. (Remember: you don’t actually have any of those things.)
- DO learn to draw a swastika better than this.
Anything else my list is missing?
I just want to make sure that anyone who wants to cry wolf at least has a vague idea what a wolf looks/sounds like. Those townspeople really WANT to believe the stories of hate crimes.
It’s a shame that ladies like Taylor and Sarah and Ashley make it so hard to trust every good, violent story we hear online…
For the more advanced student of faking hate crimes, read more here.